Hi Papa,
Yesterday after the asthi-visarjan, all ties with your physical body ended, but my emotional bonding with you will remain forever.
Goodbyes are hard when they are final. But they are hardest when they remain unspoken. I can’t get my head around the fact that you just disappeared without any warning. The regret that I didn’t even get a chance to say goodbye either to you or to babli, will remain with me always. It just happened so suddenly that I still can’t figure out why and how it happened.
You never had any kind of heart disease or even an issue of a chest pain before. I have met all the doctors and pharmacists that you were in contact with, and all of them confirmed the same. There have been conspiracy theories about covid vaccines and booster doses causing surge in heart attacks, but it just remains a speculation. I guess we’ll just have to learn to accept the fact that you are gone so unexpectedly, and the exact reason of your leaving will remain a mystery.
Missing you would be an understatement. It feels like guiding hand over my shoulder is gone. Every person riding a black activa now resembles you. Every time I lock my bike, your voice comes to my mind to double check the handle lock. Earlier you used to reprimand me over my procrastination on mundane household tasks, now I am completing your pending works. May be that’s how destiny wanted it to be; to make me become a more mature and responsible person. We had few disagreements and generational conflicts on few matters, but I will forever be grateful that you let me choose my own path and did not force me to join the family business. And I will cherish the simple things… like laughter, smiles, jokes, and fun holiday times we shared.
Wealth, power, knowledge, emotions; these are the common things parents leave behind to their children. However, apart from the above, you have left something that is very rare and unique and that is your goodwill. Every person I meet, even strangers, have shared their fond memories with you. Your social works and selfless acts have become a great source of inspiration for me. You surely had found your ikigai.
Mummy is holding on strong, though sometimes, she breaks down. It’s understandable since you both shared over forty years of togetherness and she was depended on you on so many ways. But I can promise you that me and Pooja will take care of her in the best possible manner.
Wish you stayed longer, because there are so many milestones, I’d love to share with you. But I trust you’re in a place where there’s neither pain nor sickness. Please know that you will always be my hero.
Love you always…
Indu.